Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day. Considered by many to be the most romantic day of the year. The word conjures up images of heart-shaped boxes of chocolates, red roses, and candle-lit dinners.

It is truly, truly a day of love. But, what Valentine's Day is changes based on what your definition of love is. Valentine's Day is, in its essence, a day to express your feelings to those you love.

But, sadly, for most of the world today, they see Valentine's Day only as an opportunity to show romantic love. And even how to show romantic lovehas been distorted through the years.

But Valentine's Day isn't all about romance. It's not all about the kissy, huggy feeling you get that disappears within a few days. It's about true, selfless, sacrificial love.

Maybe today, instead of buying a box of chocolates for that guy you think is slightly attractive, you could buy some candy for your little brother.
Maybe having a tea party with your little sister will show more love than an expensive dinner at an Italian restaurant ever would.

Maybe giving your mom a card will make her happier than it would ever make your boyfriend.

Maybe your family and friends are just as worth your expressions of love than your romantic interest.

Valentine's Day shouldn't be about what you get, but what you give.
And if you're feeling down because you don't have a valentine this February, remember that you received the most beautiful, sweet, loving Valentine that's ever been sent. Can't you just picture it?

Don't forget the greatest Valentine ever sent on this day of love. John 3:16. Never forget how much you are deeply, truly loved. And show that love to those around you in return.

Can You Love Someone You've Never Met?

Can you love someone you've never met? Love them so much that it feels like your heart's about to burst out of your chest and fly halfway across the world to them?

I think so.

I've been told by some that my attachment to children I meet could be seen as a bad thing. I wish I could say they were wrong. There are so many children that I love. Carmensita. Hectór. Cesár. Levi. Jace. Evan. Some I've met, some I've never laid eyes on.

Some people say it's ridiculous. It's absolutely impossible for me to love this little boy as much as I do already. Isaac is four years old. He lives at Maria's Big House of Hope, and he has spina bifida. There is not much prospect for him in China, but there is the hope of a forever family in America. Maria's Big House of Hope can only hold him for one more year. Then he goes back into the state-run orphanage. He will not be cared for like his at MBHOH.

I love Isaac. I love him with all of my heart. It gives me great pain to think that he might not get adopted. It keeps me up at night. I shed tears for him. I don't know why.

See, I think loving someone is all about the connection. Hectór made such an impression on me because he reminded me of Levi. I thought, What if this was Levi? I think it's the same with Isaac.

I didn't want to go to Maria's Big House at first. I didn't want to go to China. I didn't feel called there. Until I saw this video of Isaac. I made a connection. His laugh sounded so much like Jace's when he was little. I thought, What if that was Jace?

So, yes. I think it's very possible to love someone you've never met. Love them so much it hurts.

Think about Jesus. I wonder if it pains Him that He can't meet us face to face right now. Does he wish with all his heart that he could just hold us in His arms and give us a hug? Does His heart feel like it's going to explode He loves us so much?

If it's anything like the way mine is for Isaac, I bet it does.

Sisterhood (Not of the Traveling Pants)

Of all the jobs that I have in this life right now - musician, orphan advocate, composer, author. The one I take most seriously is that of sister.

I hear a lot of people say they hate their brothers and sisters. They'd be better off without them. I don't understand that. I know I couldn't live without Jace and Levi, now Evan too. I'd be absolutely crushed if I found out that Evan couldn't come home.

When I say that being a sister is a job, that's what I mean. But it's a good job, a happy job, albeit a job that requires patience and love.

Being the oldest in my family, I've grown up learning how to sacrifice for those I love. When I was four and we adopted Jace, I had to learn to share Mom and Dad. Jace needed them too. When Levi came I learned to sacrifice time and convenience. You can't take the short and easy way with a Down syndrome child.

I have a responsibility to my siblings, a responsibility to lead them in the right direction. Whether they admit it or not, they are influenced by me and look up to me. For instance, Jace would never have picked up on film scores by himself. He likes them and listens to them because I do. Levi, as well, has picked up on some Black Eyed Peas while I've been listening. The other day when I was listening to it he signed "night" and "sleep" during I Gotta Feeling ("tonight's gonna be a good night").

As their older sister, as well, I protect them. Though it's harder to show for Jace, I am very defensive about him too, and care for him just as much as Levi. For instance, today at his first basketball game, there was a child on the other team he was guarding who was taller than him (and Jace is TALL) and was pretty much a basketball prodigy. Okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating a bit, but I thought that kid needed to be kicked out of the game and they all needed to step aside and let Jace shoot.

Or, if I here Levi start crying in another room, I rush in and grab him up into my arms. To me, there is no better feeling than when Levi puts his tiny little arms around me and lays his head down on my shoulder.

One of my biggest fears is that something will happen to us kids while Mom and Dad are gone, and I won't be able to protect Jace and Levi. Like if burglars broke in and had guns and wanted to kidnap us. I couldn't protect them. I can't fight guns! But, when I really think about it, I would absolutely have no hesitation jumping in front of a bullet for Jace or Levi.

But that's what it is to be a sister, to me. I would die for Jace or Levi or Evan. I love them so much I would die.

I'm their big sister, and that's what I do.

Why Not Date?

I was with a few families I know a couple of weeks ago and, of course, all the girls were shut up in a room sharing secrets and talking about annoying teachers and guys they liked and all sorts of stuff like that (it's a girl thing).

Now, I may be a rare kind of person, but I'm just not really into dating relationships right now. Sure, I think some guys are cute and all, but I never think now, my mind is always on later.

There was a girl there who was in 4th grade and she'd already had three boyfriends. Now, I know some girls develop romantic feelings earlier than others, and I'm just a late bloomer, and blah, blah, blah... But why? That's my question? Why do you date when you don't get anything out of it?

I've heard people say that it's fun. They say they're in love. Well, that may be, but every time you date someone, you give a little bit of your heart to them. Girls, you may try to deny it, but we just can't help it. We are emotional beings, and we get emotionally attached whether we realize it or not. I have a friend whose dated about five guys this year, and it's the same every time. She's in love, they go out for a few weeks, then he breaks up with her and it breaks her heart. As much fun as it sounds, or however in love you may be, it's just not worth all the heartache.

Statistics show that only 2% of people today marry who they dated in high school.

Less than 1% marry who they dated in middle school.

Elementary school doesn't even have a statistic.

After I throw all that statistical information at people, they're comeback is usually, "Well, why not date?"

1) I can hang out with guys without worrying about whether or not they're a prospective boyfriend.

2) I don't have to deal with all the drama that comes with being in a relationship.

3) I never have to be depressed about a breakup.

My philosophy is that you shouldn't date until you're ready to marry. I mean, isn't that the point of dating anyway? To find out if you'd be good in a marriage relationship together?

And (a personal dream of mine), to take it to the extreme, I would really rather not date until I am married. People today think that's impossible, but I say that anything is possible with God. And I don't see Him being too upset about me saving every single little piece of my heart for my husband. I want my first kiss to be on my wedding day. My heart already swells when I think that I will be able to tell my husband, I saved my first kiss for him. Can you imagine how special that would be? You shouldn't think in terms of 'how much can I get away with?'. You should think 'how little can I do?'.

I mean, on your wedding day, you wouldn't want to tell your husband, "I was in love with 3, or 15, or however many guys before I met you." No. Personally, I want to wait. I want to get away with doing the least. I don't even want to hold hands! And, let me tell you, just thinking about that wedding day, where I can say to my husband, "I never dated anyone before you. I never held hands with anyone before you. My first kiss is today, on my wedding day," makes me swell with joy. So just consider waiting. It's worth it.

Fear and Love

Today at church, our youth minister was telling us the story of the Man of God of Judah (It's in 1 Kings 13 for anyone who wants the REAL DEAL). To make it more exciting and more understandable, I will present to you my own version (which is basically the same just with smaller words):

One day God told a man of God from Judah to go to Bethel to King Jeroboam (Jair-a-BO-m), who was a king that worshiped false gods, and tell him that he was DEAD WRONG. Now that's a pretty brave thing to do. 'Cause back then, you'd probably be seized and arrested on spot for telling ol' Jeroboam that he was DEAD WRONG. But the man of God from Judah went anyway and told King Jeroboam that the altars were going to be burned down and his rule would end in ashes, etc. King Jeroboam pointed at the man and said, "Arrest him!" But just then, his arm shriveled up and he couldn't pull it back. So his arm was just stuck pointing. Then he started to get really freaked out and was probably thinking, "Oh, dang. I totally messed with the wrong God here..." So he asked the man of God from Judah to pray for him so his arm wouldn't be all shrivel-y. The man of God of Judah did and the arm came un-shriveled. Then the King, who was totally trying to get on the man of God from Judah's good side so his altar wouldn't burn to the ground, invited him into his house to have dinner and stuff. But the man of God from Judah refused because God had SPECIFICALLY told him not to eat or drink and to come straight back. So the man of God of Judah left. When he was on his way out of Bethel, an old prophet of God came up to him and asked him to come to dinner. The man of God from Judah told him the same thing that he had told King Jeroboam. But then the old prophet did something very nasty and mean.

He lied.

He told the man of God from Judah that God had told HIM that it was okay for the man to eat. So the man of God from Judah agreed and went to eat with him. And then God told the old prophet while they were eating to tell the man of God from Judah that he was going to die that day because he'd disobeyed God.

So on his way back to Judah, the man was viciously attacked by a lion. And the lion and the donkey stood side by side, watching over the body of the man of God from Judah.

Is that weird or what? I mean, that's like worthy-of-Lord-of-the-Rings kind of stuff. Our youth minister then told us that the point of the story was to take obedience to God seriously. That scared me.

It made me feel like if I did something wrong, God was going to strike me down. But, fortunately for us, Jesus came and God has tons of mercy along with his little issue with disobedience. But, it still didn't rest easy for me. The closest thing I can compare it to is the beginning of Kung Fu Panda.

And, yes, I did say Kung Fu Panda.

In Po's dream, he says, "Never before had a panda been so feared, and so loved."

I think that's sort of what our relationship with God should be like. We know that he could totally kill us any second if he wanted to, but we love him because he chooses not to.

Fear and love go hand in hand.