A Better Friend

Sometimes I am a horrible friend.

Sometimes I selfishly put myself before the people I love. Sometimes I have selfish desires that motivate what I do for others. Sometimes I do good things just to be noticed. Sometimes I don't want to help. Sometimes I don't want to lead. Sometimes I don't want to initiate. Sometimes I wish that I could own something instead of letting other people take charge. Sometimes I wish I could work alone. Sometimes I don't want to be around people. Sometimes I'm jealous of my friends. Sometimes I wish they weren't so incredible, that way they'd be jealous of me. Sometimes I am a terrible friend, in thought and in action.

But I always want to be a better friend.

It strikes me that without God, I would show all of the above traits, all the time. Without God, I would be a selfishly shallow person, a terrible friend who cares only about herself. I battle those things daily, but with God, I overcome them. Sometimes they win. Sometimes I'm jealous, or hurtful, or selfish. But all the time, I have a God who picks me up when I fall down. Who reprimands me when I'm wrong. Who is constantly teaching me how to be a better friend.

I am so thankful for a God that is a better friend than I will ever be.